We’re living in a world where everybody is more and more connected to others by technology. Everyone tries to follow trends,everybody focus on capturing every moment instead of living it,everyone tries to show their apparently”perfect” life on social media ,but do you really believe in perfection? Do you really think all the pictures you see on Instagram represent happiness? I honestly don’t think so ! Everyone knows “everything” about everyone but we’re still strangers when we meet on the street. If you want how your friends are doing,don’t watch their instagram stories, ask them instead,meet them in person. Everyone shows only what they want to show about their life and people believe that this is reality. I call it superficiality. Everyone is seeking attention, everyone wants just to fit in because the truth is that we’re living in a world where we’re afraid of not being accepted, of standing alone and we’re becoming more disconnected from what is actually important- empathy,real life.
I say “we” because me too I use my phone and camera a lot,me too I use Instagram and post a lot of pictures but I still know the difference between reality and virtual world and I always try to see beyond appearance.
I remember being a kid and going to my friend’s door to invite her to go out and play together. Now we need an appointment when we go to someone’s house or just to go out and have a cup of tea together . We used to play a lot outdoors,to run and do a lot of games with other kids. Seeing how much childhood has changed nowadays makes me even more thankful for my childhood. We were happier ,even without IPhones, as a lots of kids have now since they’re in 5th grade ,we didn’t use to spend hours playing computer games or watching videos on YouTube,but we enjoyed time together at the park or at someone’s house.
We’ve become more technological and superficial and loneliness replaced the joy and excitement in our souls and it seems like it’s really hard to find motivation for everything . We don’t know anymore how to appreciate our time,relationships and real feelings . I don’t think technology and socials have only negative parts,of course ,but most of the people are using them in a wrong way , that way that divides us . There are a lot of times when you prefer staying at home,comfortable in your bed instead of going out to meet people. Don’t you? We all have those moments…
I think we should spend more quality time to reconnect with people,to watch in each other’s eyes when we talk ,to listen to the voice of someone when they’re talking about their feelings,to pay attention and be present not only with our body but with our mind too,to have real conversations. Talk about life,nature,about your dreams,visions,about future,aliens,watch the sky,enjoy the nature(it has so much to offer!),listen to your favourite playlist and dance,read a book,breath !
Spend some time alone to reconnect with yourself-most of the people associates being alone with loneliness,but,trust me,when you are able and brave enough to stand alone you’ll feel less lonely when you’re with no one around – go visit new places,do the things that you have always wanted to but that have always scared you, get out of your comfort zone (I know,this thing seems so scary,it scares me too).
I have spent a whole year living alone and I can say it was one of the best experiences of my life!I needed it, even though it was not easy :I had a lot of responsibilities that I had to face alone,but I can say it was really worthy. I have always been an independent person and I have always liked to do things alone -I remember when I was about 9 years old,one day I was walking down the street holding my dad’s hand and I was talking to him and suddenly he stopped,he watched me and smiled then he said that he couldn’t believe I was thinking as an adult at my age – I have spent a lot of time by myself but I had always known that I wasn’t completely alone before this experience. This was an opportunity to discover myself,it was a real challenge that made me find out who I am and what I actually want and how I feel,it made me grow,it made me stronger and a little wiser and ,finally ,it made me realise that we are all able to do anything if we want to. I know myself pretty well ,I know my limits and I know that I do still have a lot to learn, but I still have moments when I feel like I can’t do it anymore and it feels even hard to breath,when I don’t know what I am doing ,where I am going,when I don’t know what is wrong with me ,anyway,as every human being , but then I remember that nothing lasts forever, neither good nor bad days, and our happiness depends on us .We can’t control everything,what people think about us or how they feel,but we can control our reactions ,our thoughts:it is all about perspective. Life is short! Sometimes we forget it and think that we’ll live forever but we won’t! Maybe there will not be another “later”,another ” tomorrow “. Life is now and every moment matters! Maybe one day you’ll wake up and realise that you missed your chance and you spent your whole life trying to live somoene else’s life, trying to fill the empty spaces with material things that give you temporary happiness,with people that didn’t make you feel yourself ,taking for granted things that really matter,things that you can’t buy and those ones who really cared about you but you were too blind to see it.
This is what I would have told myself years ago, when I used to feel like an alien on this planet and I keep telling myself everytime I feel lost,this is my note to self: dare to live your life as you want to and forget about our society’s standards,forget about people’s expectations! Do what makes you feel alive !Don’t let anyone tell you who you should be,what you should or shouldn’t do, who you should love or not ,allow yourself to feel,cause not feeling is even worse than feeling pain! Love without expectations ! Live! Let yourself be vulnerable and ask for help when you need it ,it doesn’t make you a weak person,it takes courage to do it and it takes courage to admit when you’re wrong and start over! Be strong enough to stand alone in every situation! Don’t be afraid to get lost! Take your time! Evetually you’ll find yourself , just go your own direction. Dare to be different!
(This quote is by Maya Angelou ,from one of my favourite books:BRAVING THE WILDERNESS.The quest for true belonging and the courage to stand alone by Brenè Brown)